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Tuesday, January 6, 2015

Sarcasm: I Was Only Joking!

emotional abuse, getting healthy
I have lost friends over this one.

The simple fact is, people who love one another do not make fun of each other unless they both agree to the rules. I had a friend who simply could not appreciate the fact that adults and other healthy people do not feel the need to grind another person under their heel for a laugh and then claim I was only joking!

If one human being says to another I don't find that funny, please stop, then the second human being needs to respect that.

Oftentimes disrespect, anger, dishonesty, and other painful or negative emotions are often hidden in jokes. Why?  The person who cannot speak honestly and respectfully about issues that bother them will hide their true thoughts in jokes. Sarcasm is the weapon of a truly illiterate, damaging, and obtuse adult.

The barbs are hidden, but every one of us can feel them anyway. The fact is, a person who manipulates or tears down a person often uses sarcasm to hide what is, essentially, open season on teasing and shaming.  Their trick is that it makes you look petty to confront that which they are calling humor.  It makes you doubt yourself, question yourself, wonder if you really are too sensitive.  YOU are the strong one for recognizing the truth.

YOU are the strong one.

Make no mistake, they know they are sending you mixed messages, they know that their jokes are aimed at your insecurities...their jokes are the poison that you think that they are.

TRUST YOURSELF. Trust that you know exactly what is happening.  Recognizing the hidden truth of their joking is the same thing as recognizing their infidelity while they call you jealous, recognizing their abuse while they call you sensitive or bitter, and recognizing that they are truly lying to you while they call you crazy. Unhealthy, crumbling people hide behind humor. They will never admit this, acknowledge it, or claim it. Don't waste your time in getting them to see what they are doing.

You have caught them in their not-so-subtle trick of using humor to be rude, cruel, shallow, undercutting, or just plain hurtful.

It's not funny.

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