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Friday, December 11, 2020

I'm Offended!

 

It's easy to point out the rudeness, the cognitive dissonance, or the weird irony of people who tend to make fun of someone saying I'm Offended by What You Are Saying. That's the easy part.

There can be more to this relationship with the person who tends to speak/post/act with the thought that they are being assertive rather than aggressive. It's possible to extend this relationship with this person who tends to think everyone is thinking it, I have the balls to say it. The relationship might be salvageable.*

Yes, pointing out the rudeness is easy; what might be harder is to take a moment and listen to the person who is annoyed with someone someone else's sensitivity. (The language here is a bit cumbersome and I'm trying to be clear. Stick with me.) For the sake of clarity and simplicity, I'm going to call the offended person Person A and I'm going to call the person making the brash, offending statements Person B.


I'm convinced that most people* mean to do the right thing. Their intentions are their saving point. Though, some People Bs simply have no interest in the emotions or thoughts of those that they choose to bully or abuse verbally and these relationships are the ones that may be best to limit or terminate completely. But some people, those whose friendships are salvageable, are unaware that the way they speak carries a sting. For these people, I offer these few simplified suggestions.

 

  • Some people may not be aware of their general negativity. For these people, it is possible that they are sitting on top of some unprocessed anger, pain, grief, fear, or other emotion. 
  • Almost all negativity comes from an underlying belief that the world is not a good place to live and that people are mostly bad. Imagine living like that.
  • Most judging, pessimistic, and negative people think that the things outside of them cause their negative feelings.
  • So, in some ways, their negativity is a cry for help, a cry for hope, a cry for a reminder of the good things in life.*
    Simply know this.
  • We are all responsible for our own happiness. 
  • In all things, Person A, seek your own happiness. Beyond all natural consequences of living a life, manifest as much positivity in your life as you can. You cannot and will not "heal" Person B's negativity.
  • Therefore, avoid Person B and/or Person B's behavior any time you can. Be your positive, happy self, Person A. Hope that Person B learn from you. And simply live your life, thrive in your life, with as much joy as possible.


Always, and overall, it is our relationships that make life worth living that that give life meaning. If one or more of your relationships offer this type of negativity, I suggest you read more about bullying, healthy relationships, and getting yourself free. ☺️



*  If you have ended a relationship with someone who is abusive, do not return to it!
*  This reference does not refer to abusive, narcissistic people.
*  I DO NOT recommend that you shower negative people with your goodness; this WILL backfire.


What Do You Think?

 

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